9/1/2022 - man i wish i was born a boy

 Heyo!

So I was afab1 but about two years ago I came out as non-binary. I've always felt kind of off in my body, with my name, with my hair, with my image. 

So I changed my name. I went by they/them pronouns. And a lot of people were supportive. Some weren't but that was to be expected honestly. So there I was with this new part of me to figure out. I had a girlfriend at the time, TL. Here's how me coming out went:

Me: "Hey TL I have something to tell you."

TL: "Okay?"

Me: "So I'm non-binary. My name is Alex. And my pronouns are they/them. So I don't go by deadname anymore."

TL: "No."

So yeah. Eventually she accepted me but also wanted to change her name and that was a trainwreck cause it was a lot of her faking being trans and that was.... a lot.

Anyway I broke up with her after a bit because she was #abusive and we don't stand for that in this household. Then I became an employee at a grocery store! And I told them my pronouns and they were super accepting. I was mistaken a lot for my fellow trans coworker cause we had the same hair and body shape but it was fine, he's a cool guy. Anyway, when I was getting introduced to people my manager used he/him pronouns for me and it was all like

💡HOLY SHIT I LOVE THAT SO MUCH AHSBOWINFOIENGPNWFI💡

in my head so that's how my pronouns went from:

she/her ⇾ they/them ⇾ he/they ⇾ he/him ⇾ he/they ⇾ he/she/they ⇾ he/him ⇾ he/they

he/they is where we're at now. But it's been a fat minute since I've been out and man the dysphoria hits fucking hard sometimes. Like lately I just wish I was born a boy. I wish I could wear dresses and makeup and skirts and be seen and perceived as:

"Wow that dude looks rlly hot in a skirt and eyeliner!" 

instead of:

"Wow she looks hot!"

Anyway from a random trans dude on the internet to fellow trans people out there:

It's going to be okay! Even if you weren't born in the right body (twins) that's okay! There's always surgery AND shifting where you can be anyone you want!

Have an amazing day!

-A

1 Assigned Female At Birth